03 December 2008
There are classy fans and then there are Florida fans. Every time I say to a Georgia fan that LSU has the worst fans in the SEC, they tell me to take a trip to Gainesville and my opinion will change.
Maybe, maybe not, but I know one thing for sure. They are the best dressed fans, hands down. Picture this if you will: It is a warm day in the fall in central Florida and there stands a man about 5 feet 5 inches tall weighing in at at least 140 lbs.
He is wearing a youth XL tank top that fits loosely enough so as not to take away from his farmer tan that he earned picking up cans along the roads of Alachua county. (Hey, a man's gotta eat, right?) This gentleman is standing in his velcro tennis shoes and tube socks - pulled all the way up, natch - sipping his Pabst Blue Ribbon, maybe a Natural Light if it was payday yesterday.
As the lovely co-eds walk by and are told all the things he would do to them, and then how they aren't up to his standards after they rebuff his advances, he stands there adorning the garment that makes Florida fans...well Florida fans.
The jort, Oh, the jort. Whether it be of the cut-off variety or for the uppity gator, the hemmed version, the jort can only be pulled off by the most classy of SEC fans. So, hats off to you Florida gator fan for rocking the attire that makes the rest of the conference oh so envious.
By the way, you might want to pack a sweatshirt, I hear it will be a little chilly in Atlanta this weekend.